Archive for the 'Is/Is Not' Category

Is/Is not: Being an expat

NS May 21st, 2008

I haven’t done one of these in awhile so thought it was time to roll out another.

Being an expat is:

  • Exciting in the beginning
  • Confusing and annoying at times
  • Rewarding often
  • An adventure always
  • Being absent
  • Grieving alone
  • A cultural education
  • The experience of a lifetime
  • Getting lost
  • Finding yourself
  • Calling two places ‘home’
  • Feeling guilty that you aren’t there, physically, for your family

    • Being an expat is not:

  • Easy or effortless
  • Severing ties
  • Forgetting your roots
  • Running away
  • An excuse for lack of communication
  • The same as your summer in Europe
  • Cheap
  • Without heartache

    • Is/Is Not: Motherhood

    NS January 9th, 2008

    Motherhood is:

    • Full of surprises, pain and more joy than one could ever imagine
    • Often difficult
    • Sometimes effortless
    • Sleepless nights
    • Using your sleeve to dry eyes and sometimes noses
    • Looking at your child and wondering how anything could ever be so beautiful
    • Heartache
    • Humility
    • Feeling your soul catch in your throat when harm befalls him or her
    • Sitting glued to one spot, despite numb limbs and boredom, to allow a sick child to sleep
    • Making a fool of yourself in public to make your child laugh, and not caring what anyone thinks
    • Recognising that you’ll have to let go one day — and being simulataneously petrified and exhilirated at the thought
    • Being responsible for your own and your child’s actions
    • A partnership with your community
    • Not being able to imagine a world without your children in it

    Motherhood is not:

    • Martyrdom
    • Unfeminist
    • Expecting others to bow to you or your children
    • Sanity-preserving
    • A dictatorship
    • Easy
    • The end of your fashion sense, sex life, friendships or career if you don’t want it to be
    • Something to be sneered at
    • Merely ‘breeding’
    • A status symbol
    • Always putting your child’s needs first — nor your own
    • Instilling humiliation, fear or hate in your child
    • A competition

    Is/Is Not: No. 2 in a series

    NS November 26th, 2007

    As promised, a second entry in my Is/Is Not series. The first was on Feminism. This one is on Breastfeeding.

    Breastfeeding is:

    • Natural
    • Beautiful
    • Best for the baby
    • A bonding experience
    • Often difficult (in the beginning)
    • Sometimes painful (in the beginning)
    • More portable and convenient than bottles and formula
    • Free
    • Empowering
    • Biologically awe-inspiring
    • Environmentally friendly
    • A public health issue that deserves more attention and respect from the medical community
    • 90% more likely to happen if you have unwavering support from your partner and/or family
    • One of the most rewarding things I have ever done

    Breastfeeding is not:

    • Weird
    • Gross
    • Silly
    • Sexual
    • Embarrassing
    • Something that has to be done in private, like it’s a dirty little secret
    • Similar in any way, shape or form to someone urinating, vomiting, defecating or masturbating in public
    • Only for hippies and sanctimonious know-it-alls
    • Overrated — it really is that important to a baby’s health
    • Automatically critical of formula feeding
    • Only for stay-at-home moms — plenty of working women breastfeed successfully
    • A debate that should divide women

    Would you add anything to either list? (Please keep it respectful and intelligent)

    Is/Is not: Feminism

    NS November 13th, 2007

    As part of a new series, I will be listing what certain ideals, events, places, people or things are and aren’t. Today’s topic is Feminism (inspired by my lovely hubby and a discussion I had today with some other women).

    Feminism is:

    • believing that gender inequality still exists
    • being outraged at the pay gap (17% in the UK)
    • standing up to being judged based on attractiveness to the opposite sex
    • knowing how it feels to be groped, leered at or intimidated by a complete stranger in public
    • ever wishing that men could understand, for even one day, what it’s like to be a woman
    • being called a feminazi, man-hater, lesbian, radical or bitch for speaking your mind or taking control of your own life
    • having freedom of choice in all aspects of life
    • being a mother or child free but not judging others’ lifestyles
    • not participating in the ‘mommy wars’
    • refusing to back down when asked to leave for breastfeeding in public
    • standing up for the rights of those not able or willing to do it themselves
    • choosing a partner who believes you are just as smart/powerful/capable as he is
    • choosing education over ignorance
    • loving yourself enough to identify as one

    Feminism is not:

    • having hairy legs
    • hating men
    • thinking women are better than men
    • being incapable of having a sense of humour
    • aggression
    • only possible if working outside of the home — SAHMs can be feminists too
    • devaluing domestic work
    • being a ‘slut’
    • never baking cookies or cleaning
    • flogging your male partner into submission to prove your feminist credentials

    What would you add to either of these lists?