NS September 24th, 2009
I’m not one for dwelling on what might have been, but I do have a few regrets. They’re mostly small things that probably don’t matter too much in the grand scheme of things but I still wonder sometimes. What if…?
- Not doing better in high school – I was certainly intelligent and capable enough to have been in the top 10% of my class so why did I end up only in the top 25% and miss all of the scholarships, grants, etc..? Because I couldn’t be bothered to do the homework and ass-kissing that is required. I’ve always done splendidly at the big tests but couldn’t face the daily grind of homework sheets, quizzes and so on, dragging my overall grade down in the process. My teachers often wrote in my report cards: “Not living up to her full potential.” They knew what I was too arrogant and young to realize
- Never living on my own before getting married – I know that some people hate living on their own and I don’t know for certain how I would like it since I’ve never done it but I’d like to have done it before I settled down with one man to have children. I never experienced that ‘single career gal in the city’ lifestyle, not even for a little while, and I wish I had
- Spending so much money on our wedding — It wasn’t a ridiculous sum of money, just about at the national average at the time, but it was still more than we should’ve spent. I admit, I got a bit carried away with the idea of having a big party. The ‘girly/romantic’ bits didn’t interest me that much, but the band, and the food and the swanky venue? I had so much fun planning that! A little too much, I guess. I wish now that we’d have scaled things way back and used some of the money my parents gave us to pay off debts and student loans, or put towards a down payment for a house. I don’t regret the actual wedding (not at all, it was a blast!) but if I could go back in time I’d cut my budget in half and slap myself silly for spending so much money on silly things like centerpieces and flowers
- Changing my name — I actually didn’t take The Noble Husband’s name upon marrying him and was perfectly happy with that decision. However, six years later, when I found myself heavily pregnant with our first child and fretting about how complicated it would be to have a different name to my husband and child, I went ahead and did it. Besides the social and bureaucratic reasons, it also just felt a little unfair, emotionally, to do all the hard work of carrying and bearing a child and then feel detached from it on every little piece of paper I fill out and in every social situation for the rest of our lives. TNH had no problem with me not changing my name but he didn’t want to combine his name with mine or create a new one. Growing up, he had a double-barreled name, which he hated, and had changed his name to only one of them. So going back to two wasn’t an option for him. Instead of coming up with another solution or standing my ground, I just changed my name. I really like my husband’s surname and I don’t feel like I became his property or lost my old identity somehow but I do think it’s unfair that I won’t share my original surname with my children simply because I am their mother and my name is not deemed as important
- Not establishing healthier eating and exercise habits — I had the opportunity to decide how I was going to manage my diet and physical activity upon leaving home and went the lazy route. Now I find it a real struggle to get out of a lifetime of bad habits. I’m slowly trying to rebuild them but it feels like a constant battle. And it’s not about appearance or thinness or anything like that. It’s just about giving my body what it needs to feel good and knowing that I’m letting it (and ultimately, my health) down
- Not learning a second language — It gets harder as you get older and I just don’t have that natural knack for languages, like some do. I get embarrassed too easily when I get things wrong, especially things that I think will make me look ‘uncultured’ or ‘unworldly’ and so I’m afraid to open my mouth around native speakers or those who are fluent. I took three years of Spanish in college, I should be fairly decent at speaking and understanding it but I’m pretty crap, really. I can read it fairly well and write it okay but my person-to-person comprehension and conversational skills are poor. I keep vowing to dive back into it but I know that, realistically, it won’t happen until both kids are at school. It requires dedication and time that I just don’t have right now. Hopefully someday…
Geez, reading back over those you’d think I was regretting getting married! I assure you (and you, TNH!) that that’s not the case. The fact is, though, that I got married very young (20) and so there are certain aspects of life that I simply didn’t experience. On the other hand, I don’t feel that I “missed out” because TNH and I were married for several years before we began having children and we had a rollicking good time during those years. That’s one thing I’ve had zero regrets about — my relationship with him. I know I can’t see into the future but I’m fairly certain he and I are going to last.
What about you, what are your biggest regrets?
NS August 27th, 2009
The sore throat that TNC woke up with the other night was mild and short-lived but it was enough to pass onto her brother. The Noble Baby now has quite a bad case of tonsilitis and has been absolutely miserable for the past two days. His temperature spiked up to 39.7C (103.4F) yesterday, truly alarming me and causing us to rush to the doctor and TNH to leave work and come home. He’s just had his first dose of antibiotics and is sleeping for the time being but I know I’m in for another night of soothing and cuddling and tending to my poorly little boy.
TNH is going out of town on Saturday so let’s hope the baby has improved by then. At least TNC will be gone for the day as well, with her grandparents. If TNB is still miserable, I can sit with him slumped on my chest and watch season two of Mad Men, which has been a favourite pasttime as of late. I’m supposed to be watching them with TNH but I can’t help myself and keep watching them when he’s working late or out.
Between my new Mad Men obsession and sick children and an out-of-town husband, I have a feeling posting may be light over the long weekend. If I don’t get slightly tipsy one night and decide to drunk-blog, I will catch y’all next week.
NS July 20th, 2009
Wow, things have been really lean here for quite awhile, eh? I really thought I’d have blogged more in the 10 days since I’ve been back but my sister only left yesterday and today, being Monday, is…well, Monday. Mondays require list-making, bank-balance-checking, food shopping, outing planning, cleaning, and frantically flipping through the untouched vestiges of the Sunday papers that I haven’t gotten round to reading yet. I have so many things I want to blog about — so many big, important, thoughtful things — and yet I keep delaying and procrastinating and finding other things to do. I’m searching for my blogging mojo and struggling to crank some life back into it. It will come, I know, I just need one good, long, uninterrupted stretch of time and enough of a fire under my ass to get things cooking again. Hopefully that will happen tomorrow, or the next day.
In the meantime, I impart these two nuggets of information to you:
Right after I posted about my infuriating, rude and disgusting neighbours, we found out that they are moving at the end of the month. Hip-hip-hoo-bloody-ray! Honestly, you don’t know how insanely happy this makes me, and TNH. The stress and tension I usually experience every day as I scoop their dogs’ crap off our drive, pick their strewn garbage up from around my car’s tires and listen to them scream 900 variations of FUCK YOU at each other all day long has just melted away as I envisage the moving truck pulling away with their skanky asses aboard, gone from my life forever.
At first glance, I thought this article on cosmetic surgery for toes was a spoof from The Onion. Sadly, it’s not. Here’s an excerpt:
One might say that a high-heeled, pointy-toed shoe and a high-arched, naturally pointy foot are soul mates, a match made in heaven. But for women who long to slip into a spiky pair of Manolo Blahniks or Jimmy Choos but whose feet aren’t so accommodating, such a match can be made in the podiatrist’s office.
This is where Dr. Marlene Reid, a podiatric surgeon, and her philosophy of feet and high heels come in. She knows that years after the hit television show “Sex and the City” raised high-end footwear to near-religious status, the truly fanatical have taken highly controversial steps to wear heels — including enduring procedures to lop a little or a lot off the top of a toe.
Reid said she would never, say, amputate a toe to make it easier for someone to sport a pair of stilettos. It’s a rare surgery that has been denounced by the American Podiatric Medical Association.
But Reid, a member of the APMA and an expert in heel and tendon pain, said women should be able to wear the latest high-heeled fashions if they want. To that end, she said she has shortened toes.
…A large portion of Reid’s Naperville practice (which she shares with her husband, who’s also a podiatric surgeon) involves patients with heel problems. But over the years, she has seen her share of women who yearn to wear high heels as extravagant as the ones in the paintings that adorn her office walls.
She said many of her female patients are self-conscious about their feet. “For some women, going to the podiatrist’s office is as big a deal as going to the gynecologist’s office,” she said. “We place such a premium on beautiful feet and beautiful shoes.”
And the pressure to bare those toes is ever increasing. It’s more common these days to see women with open-toed shoes in the office. Even young girls are getting pedicures far earlier than ever.
Reid said it’s important for patients to know the risks attendant to any surgical procedure. They also have to understand the possible outcomes, and that some procedures may require lengthy recovery times.
“But as a woman, I don’t feel I should tell my patients they can’t wear stylish shoes,” she said. “I’ll educate them and give them advice on wearing custom orthotics or a pointy shoe with an elongated toe box. Or I’ll tell them to take a few minutes out of the day to stretch their calves or tendons. But my job is — within reason — to try to make it possible.”
Is that the most screwed up, patriarchy-upholding thing you’ve read in a while, or what? “Hey, women need these toe surgeries because they need to fit into foot-deforming high heels to conform to ridiculous beauty standards at the cost of their health and self worth. Let’s give them a hand in this noble endeavour!” /sarcasm
Seriously, that makes my head hurt. I need to go to bed now and dream of puppies and comfortable shoes. G’night!
NS June 24th, 2009
I woke up at 7am this morning, completely perplexed. The Noble Baby hasn’t slept past 5.30 since we arrived, with some days starting at 3 or 4. I picked him up and walked into the living room, where I heard my sister’s and TNC’s voices. I assumed TNC had only just woken up as well so asked my sister, “Did she come and get you just now?” to which she replied, “Um, no. She came and woke me up at 5.30 this morning. When I asked her where you were she said ‘Mummy is so very tired, she needs to sleep.’ I assume you put her up to this?”
I wish I could take the credit for this stroke of genius but, hand on heart, I didn’t. I have to say though, I really, really like it. And god bless her cottons, I really did need that extra bit of sleep. I’m sure her motivation was nothing more than a desire to play with her fun auntie instead of boring ol’ mum but I’d like to think her toddler’s intuition played a part. Whatever the reason, it was most welcome. I think I’m officially over the jetlag.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go drink a cold beer on the deck and later, after the kids are in bed and I’ve had some lovely grilled chicken and vegetables, watch fireflies light up amongst the leaves of the trees swaying in the balmy breeze.
I could really, really get used to this again.
NS June 16th, 2009
Things I have said or thought since being awakened by The Noble Baby at 4.28 this morning, followed an hour later by his sister:
No
No no nooooo
What the…?!
Holy god, what time is it?
Oh, hello Mr Sun. Did you not get the memo? It’s 4.30AM.
Really, you need to leave.
Child, I will get to you in a minute
Okay, okay
(A half hour later) Honey, wake up. I’ve served my sentence. Your turn
Oh for god’s sake, can’t you go to the toilet by yourself, TNC? It’s 5.30. Go back to bed
Okay, I’m up. Jesus!
My life sucks (cue repentent tears for ever having children)
I am in hell
How strong can I make this coffee before I risk cardiac arrest?
Leave the cat alone, TNC, or so help me god…
There ya go (tossing TNC the Cheerio box and TNB a cracker)
Ugh, I hate the Teletubbies
And the Tweenies, they’re rubbish
What did I do to deserve this?
I’m getting blackout blinds sewn onto the windows, stat
Better yet, just take out the windows. We’ll live like cave people
Is it too early to start drinking? People are still in clubs dancing out there!
Only 13 hours to go…woo!
Good things these kids are cute. Otherwise there’d be trouble
