Archive for November, 2008

Next it’ll be Horlicks*

NS November 25th, 2008

I don’t know if it’s because it’s getting colder or because I’m getting older, but I’ve been quaffing hot drinks like they’re going out of style. Whereas I used to have one, maybe two cups of coffee or tea a day, I’m now up to four. I have to restrain myself from drinking five or six because I so easily could. Since I’m breastfeeding I’m not “supposed” to be drinking much caffeine but that’s one rule I bend a little. I’ll have two regular coffees in the morning and then switch to either tea, which has less caffeine, or decaf. And I don’t have the third cup until after lunch and the last just before bed. That’s how I justify it, anyway.

It’s a sad state of affairs, really. I used to think about relaxing with an alcoholic beverage or two after a hard day. Now, my first thoughts turn to tea when I’m stressed or bored or happy, or any other emotion that warrants a drink. One evening last week I had to write a note to myself to remember to finish off the last of the red wine before it went off. How terrifyingly un-Noble-Savage-like is that?! I wonder if it will wear off once TNB is a little older and I can have more than one drink again, or if I’m resigned to a life of hot water bottles, talk radio, down quilts and heat rings on my bedside table. Tucked up in bed at 9.30pm, doing my crossword and maybe a bit of knitting while tut-tutting at the immoral young people who call in to my favourite radio program, shouting downstairs to anyone who will listen: “Put the kettle on, love!”

I may have been made in America but I’m aging in England and its obviously making its mark on me.

*For my non-British readers perhaps not in the know, an explanation

Even WordPress is admonishing me

NS November 24th, 2008

I just tried to post a second comment immediately after submitting the first and WordPress told me off. A message popped up saying “You are posting too quickly. Slow down.” I don’t know whether to take its advice or tell it to piss off.

I have about a million things on my to-do list right now and am torn between ignoring them and feeling guilty, and doing them and feeling harassed. The thing is, the less I do the lazier I feel and then I do even less than the little I was already doing, and then I get bored and cranky and cross with myself for being so useless. When I’m busy and stressed I’m at least productive and have energy. Tearing around the house with a baby strapped to my chest, a broom attached to one hand and a keyboard to the other, mopping up spills, playing games and writing blog posts in between the shopping, the school runs, the errands and the constant supervision and entertainment of a toddler may get my temperature rising but it gets my ass moving and keeps it going. When I allow myself to sit down and have a break for too long or at too frequent intervals, I find myself feeling that I’m growing roots into the armchair and may never get up from its plush, cavernous depths again.

I have some major changes I’m getting ready to implement in my daily life and it’s going to take a lot of time, effort and emotional strength to make them succeed. I know what I want to achieve, I just have to figure out exactly how to do it without driving myself bonkers. That may involve spending less time blogging but I’m hoping that’s not the case, though I may have to weed down my RSS feeds at a minimum. At the moment I’m subscribed to over 50 sites and it’s a huge time suck. I love y’all but when I spend more time interacting with other bloggers than my own child it’s a problem. It’s turning into somewhat of an addiction and I need to examine the causes of that and come up with some sensible and workable solutions that don’t involve giving it up completely but allow me to manage my time more efficiently. So we’ll see.

Love is

NS November 23rd, 2008

Holding your beautiful baby to your breast and looking into his deep blue eyes for endless swathes of time where you are the only two beings in the whole world and his milk-tinged smiles make your heart feel so light that you have to tug at it to prevent it from taking flight and leaving your body entirely, snatched and spirited away by the joy of motherhood.

All I want for Christmas

NS November 22nd, 2008

A few things on my wishlist this year:

An autographed copy of Stephen Fry’s book In America

A subscription to Ms. Magazine

The Road by Cormac McCarthy

Half of a Yellow Sun by Chimimanda Ngozi Adichie

Ani Di Franco’s new album

This canvas painting from Art.com

A pair of cherry red Doc Marten boots (though TNH beat me to it and is getting a pair for himself, damn him!)

A 13-inch MacBook

Canon digital SLR camera

Okay gang, get shopping!

Fight the H8

NS November 21st, 2008

If you haven’t already heard, the California State Senate ruled that it would review lawsuits questioning the constitutionality of the ballot initiative Proposition 8 that passed with 52% of the vote on November 4th. Prop 8 is an initiative that was set forth by anti-gay group Protect Marriage (which I refuse to link to) to “protect” marriage’s definition as between a man and a woman. From the San Francisco Chronicle:

The court agreed Wednesday to review two arguments by opponents of Prop. 8: that the measure exceeds the legal scope of a ballot initiative by allowing a majority to restrict a minority group’s rights, and that it violates the constitutional separation of powers by limiting judicial authority.

The justices also asked for arguments on whether Prop. 8, if constitutional, would nullify 18,000 same-sex weddings performed between when the court’s marriage ruling took effect in mid-June and Nov. 4. Attorney General Jerry Brown, who will defend Prop. 8 as the state’s chief lawyer, contends those marriages are legal, but sponsors of the initiative disagree.

The justices asked for written arguments to be submitted through Jan. 21. The court could hold a hearing as early as March, and a ruling would be due 90 days later.

At first glance this seems a good thing but many in the LGBT community and their supporters are not overly optimistic for a positive result and were dismayed that the Court would not allow same-sex marriages to continue while the proposition’s legality is debated. Thousands of married couples will be waiting and wondering if their unions are to be declared null and void at the desultory stroke of a pen.

A pen.

A declaration and some ink is all it would take to destroy what they’ve fought so hard for, to snatch away the unity and peace they’d finally found. The irony is that an even older, more famous declaration and some ink promised them, promised all of us, that we would be entitled to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

That declaration was wrong.

Instead, a bunch of people who don’t know or even care to know them pushed some buttons inside a booth and – poof! – their marriages go up in smoke. Who are these wizards of Oz, these faceless, nameless people behind the curtain? Do they know who they’re hurting and how deeply? Are they so afraid of what others’ marriages say about their own that they have to squash them? Do they not understand how small and foolish, how hateful and narrow-minded it makes them appear? In contrast to what many of them claim to be acting in God’s name for, do they not understand love?

If you think this is simply a case of people who will not be moved, who cannot be changed, dogs who won’t learn new tricks, read this*. If an 87-year-old war veteran can stand up for love and understand what freedom to express that love means, so can the Christian, middle-aged, middle-class couple who met at Bible college and think God looks on them with a special kind of light and has bestowed upon them a world reserved exclusively for their use and enjoyment. Even in all their deluded arrogance, I believe they could eventually be swayed to come around if they only understood that it wasn’t about them, or God, or “promoting homosexuality,” but about care and companionship.

It’s also not about politics, or the economy. Right now, it’s just about the freedom to love. Because we all deserve that.

And if you’re feeling saucy or brave or just plain pissed off, on December 10th (International Human Rights Day) you can Call in Gay and spend the day volunteering at a human rights organization instead of slumping behind a desk all depressed about it.

Fight the H8!

*Via blue milk

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